Salmon To Make Your Skin Glow

I have rubbish skin. My daughter tells me so, often. I am a master in the art of concealer (Rimmel Hide The Blemish, if you’re asking. I’ve tried many and this is just THE best). I’ve never had them on my T-zone, always on my cheeks or jaw, like a teenage boy. I was told it is “male pattern acne” caused by too much testosterone. Jesus Christ! Could it get any worse? Also known as Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. So my hormones are to blame. It will never be perfect but it has DEFINITELY got better since I cleaned up my diet.  Or perhaps it’s now that I am thirty-fucking-five and it’s harder for the spots to fight for space between my crow’s feet??? Anyway, it’s one of the reasons I try to avoid lactose as I notice it flairs up straight away if I have too much dairy, and I definitely think cutting out sugar has balanced my hormones, thus improving my skin.

So, last week, I was watching TV with daughter and a Clearasil advert came on TV. Daughter turned to me and said, in her kindest voice, with a somewhat patronising smile, “Don’t you get that Mummy…. You wouldn’t be the same without your spots” Sigh. She has also said on several occasions, with real fear in her eyes, “I won’t get spots like you when I’m older, will I?” I really hope she doesn’t, and remains peachy skinned and beautiful  throughout her teens. And twenties. And sodding thirties. God, when will they go?!!! She and her brother are totally screwed in the genetics department mind you, both me and Mr Intolerant have dreadful skin, so the odds are sadly stacked against them.


Anyway, salmon is supposed to be good for your skin. And seeds. All those omegas and essential fatty acids. So here is a salmon and seed recipe to make your skin glow, or to at least make it slightly less shit, if you’re me.  I LOVE this salad, it’s easy, tasty and protein-rich. P. S. Try to buy wild salmon, my Mum told me farmed salmon is really bad for you, so it must be true. If you want to do your own research you can read about it here Wild Vs Farmed Salmon


INGREDIENTS (serves 2)

2 salmon fillets

4 tbsps pesto (dairy free pesto if you like)

extra Virgin olive oil

handful tomatoes, fresh or sunblush

salad leaves

1/2 courgette

1/2 tin canellini beans

1/4 small red onion or 1 Spring onion

4-5 radishes, sliced

lemon juice

balsamic vinegar

pumpkin/sunflower etc seeds


1. Get your pan really hot, pat dry and season salmon. Add 1 tbsp olive oil and cook salmon flesh-side down on medium-high for 5 minutes.  DO NOT TOUCH IT. Not even a teensy bit, you want a nice crisp top.

2. Meanwhile drain and rinse beans, chop 1/4 red onion or spring onion very finely. Mix with beans, squeeze over lemon juice and season with lots of black pepper and a little salt.

3. Use a vegetable peeler to peel fairly thick strips from courgette (you want some bite).

4. You probably want to flip your salmon now if it’s had 5 minutes. Cook skin side down for another minute or two.

5. Place 2 tbsps pesto on each serving plate. Mix with about 1 tbsp Extra virgin olive oil to thin it a little. Place courgette strips, salad leaves, bean mixture, tomatoes (halved if fresh) in pesto-y bowls and mix around a little. Drizzle with about 1 tsp balsamic vinegar (you don’t need much, you have a lot of flavours going on here) and place salmon on top.  Scatter with seeds.

Burrito Lasagne… Burragne? Basagne? Any ideas?!!

I will openly admit it, I hold my hands up, this is not the ‘cleanest’ of my recipes.  And it is neither wheat nor dairy free. Sorry. But it is unprocessed, organic and tastes AMAZING!!! It is also super easy suser easy to make and is loads healthier than your average burritos or lasagne, which is why I’m going out on an intolerant limb and including it.

A few months ago my daughter innocently commented that “we always have the same things to eat” and I realised with horror that she was right! Since her younger, pickier brother came on the scene, I have experimented less and less as each attempt was met with failure. And whilst I try different things for me and the husband, or we might give a new recipe a go at weekends, I do tend to churn the same things out for the kids on weekdays. Well, no longer! I hit the supermarket with a vengeance! Some time later, after traipsing round trying to ignore small boys screams for chocolate/magazines/ anything, I trundled out with some mild Moroccan spice (see Tantrums and Tagines) which was a total waste, and some corn taco shells. Which were a hit! As they are essentially Doritos/crisps I was right to assume small boy would woof them down like a rabid dog. Brilliant.

Tacos are not the healthiest thing on the planet, but they are gluten free (hurrah!) and a welcome variation from the rice/pasta/potatoes conveyor belt as they contain corn.  I like to ‘rotate’ the kids grains where I can to try to prevent them from becoming intolerant, to get as many different nutrients in them as possible, and just for a bit of interest and flavour.  Taco filling leftovers are also fab with  wraps to make enchiladas or burritos, or just with some rice, so you have several different meals from one creation. RESULT!

Burritos in particular were such a hit that I played around with them and created this little beauty of a recipe. Once you try this you will never make lasagne again.  It takes less than half an hour to make this. Seriously, bit of chopping, 20 minutes total cooking… BOOM! Kids tea. DONE!


500g minced beef (ideally grass fed or organic)

1 onion, chopped finely

2 cloves garlic, finely chopped/crushed

1 red pepper (or any colour, doesn’t matter)

2 tsp paprika

1 tsp cumin

1 tsp oregano

1/2 tin kidney beans

2/3 tin chopped tomatoes

3 large tortilla wraps (I use these Crosta Mollica Organic Flatbread they literally contain wheat, oil, salt, unlike most other wraps which contain a million ingredients)

2 handfuls grated organic cheddar


1. Fry onion in olive oil for a few minutes, turn heat up and fry mince until browned. Then add spices, herbs, garlic and chopped pepper and fry for another 2-3 minutes. Add kidney beans and 100ml water, cover and simmer for 5-10 minutes.  The mixture should be fairly dry, you don’t want the wraps to go too soggy. Simmer with the lid off for a few more minutes if there is too much liquid.

2. Lightly oil an oven dish that will hold your wrap without it overlapping the edges or coming up at the sides. Or, cut your wraps to fit the dish you have. Lay your first wrap down and top with half the meat mixture, making sure it goes all the way to the edge of the wrap to keep everything moist. Add the next wrap and repeat with rest of meat. Top with final wrap.

3. Mash chopped tomatoes roughly with a fork to create a smoother texture. Spoon over top wrap, again making sure everything is well covered so it doesn’t dry out. Season with a little extra oregano, salt and pepper. Top with grated cheese. Bake in oven (180C) for 10 minutes or so until cheese is all bubbly and golden.

Serve with sour cream and/or guacamole if your kids will eat them. FYI mine won’t.

Class Rep Catastrophe

This is my daughter’s fourth year in school, she is in Year 3. Why do they make it so confusing, can’t they just make it year 4? Anyway, so far I have successfully dodged the bullet for dreaded class rep as some other sucker/Alpha Mum/perfectly nice helpful and organised person has wanted to do it.  This year, we are three weeks in AND STILL NO ONE HAS VOLUNTEERED!

I am feeling the pressure. I don’t work, I have 2 kids (as opposed to 3 or 4) and, mainly, I haven’t been rep yet. I can feel eyes on me. About a week ago I stupidly confided in a friend that I was feeling the pressure. Said “friend” thought it would be hilarious to therefore tell the outgoing class rep to talk to me as I was keen. Ha bloody ha. Fucking hilarious. I stood spluttering, cornered, in the playground, blabbing about how terribly forgetful I am and how I hate organising things and how I really REALLY didn’t want to do it.  Outgoing Rep seemed to take this as a sign of apparent modesty, or else just didn’t give a shit and wanted to pass the baton on at all costs. “Oh, you’ll be great!” she smiled, “it’ll be the making of you!”

I must have looked so terrified she then took a step back and, looking a little confused, and undoubtedly concerned about my mental health, said not to worry about it, she was sure someone else would step in. Great, now I look like a lazy bitch and a psycho. So that was a week ago, and I have spent the last 7 days hoping, praying, someone else would answer their calling and enthusiastically jump in. No such bloody luck.  Meanwhile, word has been spreading, and several mum-friends have given me a nudge and a wink, “I hear you’re class rep?” I have been truly stitched up. So today I finally cracked and said I would do it. What other choice did I have???!! Arrrghhh!!!

So I’m going to have to get my act together. This was, in fact, a resolution for this new school year anyhow, but it hasn’t got off to the best start. So far I had to have 3 reminders from the, frankly, terrifying school receptionist to pay £16.20 dinner money.    I also missed the deadline for returning the letter for violin lessons.  Perhaps this was fate intervening to save me from the tortuous practice I will have to endure?Even so, the lessons are free and part of the Y3 curriculum so it’s not really something you don’t do.  I had a humiliating lecture from the school receptionist about how I had missed the deadline and she would have to contact the violin lesson providers ESPECIALLY for me to see if they could perhaps, just this once, make an exception to the deadline. I stood in the office, palms sweating, feeling tearful that daughter might be the only one in her class to miss violin lessons because her stupid mother couldn’t be arsed signing a form in time. WTF is wrong with me? Why can’t I be more organised?

I have also had to pop into the office on two occasions with a PE kit and a fruit snack, respectively, that were forgotten in the morning rush.  The morning rush, incidentally, that involves us racing into school, just in the nick of time every morning. I am pathologically late.  These are not isolated incidents, this is generally how I have scraped by over the last three years.  Interestingly, at no point have I set my alarm earlier/packed bags at night/made myself a foolproof filing system; I’ve just carried on bumbling along.  So, you can see, I am perhaps not the best qualified rep out there.  But I have promised that what I will undoubtedly lack in reminding our class of dates, times and events and generally being a fount of all school knowledge, I will make up for in organising lots of mums nights out.  Here goes… 😁😁😁😁